My gosh, its been a long time.. I really need to write more, especially since I'm leaving soon.
Anyway, yeah, its July 1st. 2nd, whatever you want to call it.. I don't know exactly why or what started half of all this junk goin on, but I'm sick of crying. This is the 3rd day that I've cried, I swear that I'm going to be satisfying the need for las vegas to have rain. I come home, I keep to myself, I sit around do nothing, stare at things, shuffle through old items and start freakin out. I called Elyssa, but she didn't pick up, and randomly I held down Ashley's speed dial and didn't hang up. I didn't know that her phone had been charged and that she actually used it, so I was quite surprised when she picked up the phone and talked with me. Talking to her has been kinda fun lately, a little short, but fun none the less... I'm a sucky phone person, but whatever who cares. Anyway, we talked as I went through a bunch of my pictures, and then started getting in to the more issue related stuff. You know, the whole mission thing and how I'm staying at her mom and dad's... I don't know, I think it was a long introduction into a rant of some sort. I ended up talking to Robert who helped me understand a whole lot of things regarding some of the things we can do with the priesthood.. I didn't know about the whole casting satan and his followers and such out... it'll be quite helpful... Yeah we talked, a lot.. it was good, I needed all of it... It was so nice to hear Robert's voice. Ashley's too... Man I miss them both and am so glad that I"m going to be visiting them with Karalee and Todd in a few weeks... so yea thats most of it..
oh yeah of course... two minutes or so after I get off the phone with Robert, I picked up a bug with a tissue, flushed it down the toilet, turned around and had uncontrollable tears just streaming down my face... as much as I could try to calm myself down, nothing seemed to turn the waterworks off... I did the whole stuff your face with a pillow type thing too... that was kinda funny, but sure didn't help me a bit. Anyway, I ended up grabbing my keys, and just running... running down the street around the corner until one of the bends, then started walking and eventually just walked back slowly... Oh and I stopped by the time I got to walking. I come back in, and I guess I freaked Brizzie out or something and just went to my room to catch my breath and such.... then decided i needed some water... I got some water, sat down at the table, started drinking it, and then started thinking, then praying, then just chilling there with my eyes closed and my teeth clenched... a minute or so later Britt comes walkin down to comfort me and all I do is just cry more... freakin embarrassing really... not that I'm embarassed to cry or anything, but yeah... didn't exactly want to start crying again... thing on her mind? Satan.... yeah, love it... in similar words to Robert's, Satan is out to get me... at least thats what I think...
Its been about a year hasn't it? yeah.. kind of weird...
stupid tears.
Anyway, yeah, its July 1st. 2nd, whatever you want to call it.. I don't know exactly why or what started half of all this junk goin on, but I'm sick of crying. This is the 3rd day that I've cried, I swear that I'm going to be satisfying the need for las vegas to have rain. I come home, I keep to myself, I sit around do nothing, stare at things, shuffle through old items and start freakin out. I called Elyssa, but she didn't pick up, and randomly I held down Ashley's speed dial and didn't hang up. I didn't know that her phone had been charged and that she actually used it, so I was quite surprised when she picked up the phone and talked with me. Talking to her has been kinda fun lately, a little short, but fun none the less... I'm a sucky phone person, but whatever who cares. Anyway, we talked as I went through a bunch of my pictures, and then started getting in to the more issue related stuff. You know, the whole mission thing and how I'm staying at her mom and dad's... I don't know, I think it was a long introduction into a rant of some sort. I ended up talking to Robert who helped me understand a whole lot of things regarding some of the things we can do with the priesthood.. I didn't know about the whole casting satan and his followers and such out... it'll be quite helpful... Yeah we talked, a lot.. it was good, I needed all of it... It was so nice to hear Robert's voice. Ashley's too... Man I miss them both and am so glad that I"m going to be visiting them with Karalee and Todd in a few weeks... so yea thats most of it..
oh yeah of course... two minutes or so after I get off the phone with Robert, I picked up a bug with a tissue, flushed it down the toilet, turned around and had uncontrollable tears just streaming down my face... as much as I could try to calm myself down, nothing seemed to turn the waterworks off... I did the whole stuff your face with a pillow type thing too... that was kinda funny, but sure didn't help me a bit. Anyway, I ended up grabbing my keys, and just running... running down the street around the corner until one of the bends, then started walking and eventually just walked back slowly... Oh and I stopped by the time I got to walking. I come back in, and I guess I freaked Brizzie out or something and just went to my room to catch my breath and such.... then decided i needed some water... I got some water, sat down at the table, started drinking it, and then started thinking, then praying, then just chilling there with my eyes closed and my teeth clenched... a minute or so later Britt comes walkin down to comfort me and all I do is just cry more... freakin embarrassing really... not that I'm embarassed to cry or anything, but yeah... didn't exactly want to start crying again... thing on her mind? Satan.... yeah, love it... in similar words to Robert's, Satan is out to get me... at least thats what I think...
Its been about a year hasn't it? yeah.. kind of weird...
stupid tears.
